I live in a Chalimony state were getting married is a raw deal and divorce is just an ex post facto dowry system. The courts use a list of factors to determine the amount, if any, of alimony that will be paid from one spouse (read husband) to another (read unhappy wife). Here are a few of the reasons in italics and my comments on why they suck. There are a few of the criteria that makes more sense than others. But, these are the ones, out of a dozen, that I dislike the most.
The needs, obligations, and financial resources of each party
Everything is is supposed to be split in half. Although, I know more than a few men who took on all the debt just to get free of the process and on with life. But, at least in theory the resources, and obligations should be split in half. Giving both parties equal resources and burdens. Which makes them useless for comparison since they should be the same. The term ‘needs’ is a nebulous undefinable term that gives judges leeway to do what they feel like. What exactly does one need? And why exactly is an ex spouse responsible for my needs?
Standard of Living
This is usually referred to as the “responsibility” an ex spouse has to another to maintain them in the lifestyle they have been accustomed to. If a person becomes accustomed to a standard of living or lifestyle, then that person possesses the capacity to become accustomed to a new lifestyle. Or in some cases, their original lifestyle. The court does not force my last roommate to continue paying rent because I was accustomed to living in a luxury apartment. Just as a divorce ends, the roommate situation ended and my last roommate has no future responsibility…Provided we weren’t intimate. And of course I’ve become accustomed to blowj’s and vacuuming. Ofcourse, now that accustomed stuff isn’t applicable.
Decisions made during marriage regarding employment, parenting, education
opportunity, time and costs for a party to obtain new skills to earn more
What they are saying is the common refrain of being a mom requires sacrifice, and its not fair that the mother gives up their life to raise children. Basically, its all the man’s fault. Its assumed that he got over on her. Its somehow a good deal working day in and day out, and using your earnings to pay for the lives of other people. The stay at home mom somehow sacrifices something by being free from that bondage. In a house were most of the labor is mechanized, and the child care is handled from 8 to 3 (minimum) by a school. Its assumed had she not had to “sacrifice” she would have went on to high achievement in education and the work place.
A marriage is a partnership. All property is community property. Therefore if we as a couple make a decision for one of us to work and one of us to stay at home, whatever benefits and detriments we get from that decision, we own together. WE decided you should stay home because there was something WE got out of that. But, when the marriage is over the court will pretend that YOU forced her to stay home so now YOU should pay for it.
Whether age, physical or mental health of a child of the parties requires that one parent not work outside the home
Today on Pimp my Bride…Yo dawg I heard you liked paying child support. So, I ordered you to pay child support, then I took your alimony, and put more child support in it!
Duration of the Marriage
The rationale they say in public is that the longer the marriage, the more handicapped a wife is to reenter the workforce. I call bull. The courts know that the closer a woman gets to the wall, and especially when she passes it, she is more handicapped in finding another sucker to leech off of.
Each party’s contributions, monetary and non-monetary, to the well being of the family
This one will get a post of its own. I’m gonna do some math on that one and we’ll see about that.
Its strange to me that a hamster is able to produce so much horse shit. Well I’ve got to get to the patriarchy meeting. See you guys later.