Its Not Nice to Meet You

Introductions are great for gaming. It gives you the proverbial foot in the door (I prefer the phrase ‘tip in the wet’). An ice breaker cluster bomb with a pre-selection strafing. We grunts on the ground definately appreciate when a wing gives us that great assist. Usually the conversations following an introduction go like this

::Your Buddy with girl in tow interrupts your conversation::
Buddy: Hey gents, this is Sara
Joe: Hi, nice to meet you
Chuck: Yea, it’s a pleasure
Sara: Nice to meet you, too
Joe: So, tell us about yourself
Chuck: Yea we’d love to hear it

It was boring writing that. Mostly, I feel bad for Sara. Normally, Saturday nights are reserved for cool guys she wants to throat in the bathroom. But, since they are friends of friends she can’t be rude and blow them out. She waits a whole two minutes before leaving these guys for a forever bathroom break.

When you are introduced to a woman, treat her like a yellow light. Take notice, but you’re a man with things to do. You mash the gas and keep going forward. After a couple rounds of ‘hi nice to meet you’ don’t invite her to join your conversation. Whatever you do, don’t make the conversation about the new arrival. Go back to what you were talking about. Just because a vagina walks into the room doesn’t mean anything in your world has changed.

Don’t want to come off ass an asshole? You shouldn’t care. Here’s how the Apollo Program handles introductions:

Buddy: Hey Gents…
Joe: Watsup Buddy!
Buddy: Hey, I want you to meet Sara
Joe: Hey, how ya doin
::Joe turns back to conversation::
Joe: …like I was saying Saturn V rocket was awesome because blah blah blah
(bonus points are given for smoothly boxing Sara out and including Buddy)

Worry not friends. She will either linger around your conversation until you decide to include her or she will wander off. Maybe she wanders off and you never see her again? Not a big deal since you only invested 2 seconds in her. 9 times out of 10 she will find you again. Her biology demands it. Her mind will tell her that she’s coming back just to find out if you’re an asshole all the time. Her loins will speak the language of drip drop slosh.

Key Points
-polite
-indifferent
-do warmly greet your friends and major players
-don’t warmly greet someone just because they have a vagina
-Your time on this planet is valuable. Don’t spend it begging for pussy.

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2 thoughts on “Its Not Nice to Meet You

  1. Zodak

    This is good advice, usually guys start fawning over her in some weird competition mode, not realizing that they all lose that way.

    Reply

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